Tuesday, May 01, 2007

Possibly more effective than brandishing a firearm

The guy in the Taurus who cut me off on 59 yesterday seemed really amused watching me rant at his face in his rear view mirror. It was clear he could understand my mouthing the words "dumb-ass" (among others) and had full view of all my graphic gestures, but when I could bear his smarmy grin no longer, I snatched my wig off and threw it at my own windshield while calling him even more hideous names.

His smile disappeared at once. His face went pale.

He exited the freeway, most likely to head to the nearest confessional. "Bless me, Father, for I have changed lanes without signalling, and caused some lady in a Honda to tear her hair off."

We can only hope.

Amen.

6 comments:

Rod White said...

Pat, this is a "priceless" story! I love it... God bless you and your weapon of choice...

R-Dub

Anonymous said...

Priceless, indeed. Wish I could have seen this guy's face after your response.

Carol G.

Anonymous said...

Be careful, or you might get a nice bullet hole in your wig.

My favorite psychological warfare technique is to wave and smile, a lot! Then, their mental process goes this way:

he cuts me off...
"Got that b****!"
then sees me waving...
"Who the f*** is that?"
"Why the f*** is he waving and smiling?"
"He's so happy, I must be in deep s***, somehow!"
he then drives off road into ditch.
Gotcha!

Rob M.

Pat Wente said...

Rob, I'll try yours next.

Anonymous said...

Well, this particular post should come with an advisory similar to "use headphones in cubicle environment."

You got me going with a giggle that turned into a laugh that progressed into a full, cascading cackle of glee that provoked my cube neighborhod to wonder aloud, "Hey what's going on in there?"

My daily drive provides frequent interaction with traffic transgressors who make me want to pull my hair out. Your story tops that.

Anonymous said...

This particular blog should have come with a warning. I literally spurted Diet Coke out my nostrils!
Way to go, Pat!
Brenda