My next book will compile all of my important rules. You know, like "No one can get inside anyone else's marriage." And, "We don't drink at lunch." Important stuff like that.
So here's my new one: "To determine how long it takes to get over a hangover, take your age and divide by 20. Round up. Multiply by 12 and add 5 for each 20 years of age or fraction thereof."
Example: If you are 20, it takes 17 hours to get over a hangover. (20 divided by 20 = 1 x 12 = 12+5). Got it? If you are 60, it's 60 divided by 20, which is three. 3 x 12 = 36 and 36 + 15 = 51, which means you are too old to get bombed, as it takes two days to get over it.
This is Arithmetic, and as the t-shirt says, "I'm an English major. You do the math."
About Me
- Pat Wente
- Houston, Texas, United States
- • Married to Chuck McCabe; stepmom of Claire McCabe. Owner/mom of Casey-the-dog, whose photo appears in numerous places throughout this site. Ann counted; there are more of Casey than there are of Claire. Tip o' the hat, Ann. • Currently attempting to keep my blog up to date. Facebook is fun but it doesn't give me the room to stretch.
6 comments:
Is "This ain't f***ing Candyland" a rule?
Did we miss your first book?
It was privately published. In my mind.
There is her cookbook, which has a lot of anecdotal humor. I was referencing the essay on pizza last night and laughing out loud.
Hangover cure, pick one:
A. Don't start
B. Don't stop
This is great information! I was getting worried since I drank a combo of vodka and rum last night. And I'm pretty sure that my greasy spoon omelette will absorb all of the alcohol and it becomes a "wash". Right?
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